As an artist I am continually trying to keep my sense of excitement, awe, wonder and enthusiasm alive for the work at hand. I want to go to bed thinking about my work and wake up excited to see where it will take me. I want to be obsessed with creating art!

Recently I was feeling the need to hit the restart button. I set my brushes aside and started work on a series of small colored pencil drawings.  First I was going to do 6, then 9 then 12. My paintings are very large and there is a real feeling of dancing with the brush. Switching to a 6” x 6” format the work takes on a feeling of intimacy. Playing with marks, letting my energy pour out onto the paper through the point of a pencil, excited to see how it would all come together.

While I was working on these I was reminded of an interview I saw with the author of a novel. It went something like this:

Host: I was shocked when you killed off the main character!

Author: Yes! So was I!

Host: What do you mean? You wrote the book. Don’t you know what’s going to happen from the beginning?

Author: No. As I write the characters start to reveal themselves, just as the story does. I’m always surprised by the ending.

These little colored pencil drawing brought me back to this feeling of allowing. Picking up colors that I wasn’t use to using, allowing the questioning mind to float in and out of my reference and then moving forward anyway. Not knowing the outcome, just knowing I would get there, excited to see how the story would play out! I started thinking of these as little short stories. I started getting my enthusiasm back excited to start the next one, going to sleep thinking about them, waking up eager to get to work. I even canceled a few appointments; the need to create to express to relieve the energy coming out of my hands was strong. Yet with all the energy building the small size renders a quiet reflection of nature.

It is good to feel that excitement again, but also good to allow it to unfold in its own time.

If you are waiting for the muse to tap you on the head with their magic wand maybe you are looking for the ending of your story, not the beginning.

 Allow.